At the House of Gonad we champion The Doctrine of Positive Mediocrity. True happiness can only be obtained by accepting that we are mediocre and that all our achievements will be an amorphous mass of nihilistic understatement. This website supports the underpinning principles of Positive Mediocrity: the server is slow and archaic; the available bandwidth is highly contended and based on unreliable technology. To compound all this mediocrity, the pages are built dynamically introducing an inevitable and uncomfortable lag into the proceedings.